swimming – The Way it Really Is

October 23rd – Putting Things into Perspective

1999: Swimming this morning and on the way there I asked mummy to bib her hooter. She said she couldn’t because it was broken and I said “oh. What a shame” which she seemed to find highly amusing. When we got to the pool Al was there with his little boy and I was very pleased to see him. Mum and I went to see Aunty Eesa; Dessica was asleep so I played with Dandell. Afterwards we went to Asda where, I chomped my way around, but half way I needed to do a wee. We had to run, crash and bump the trolley and me all the way through the shop and out into the foyer but we made it just in time. Pot noodle for tea followed by milk. Fell asleep on the settee with mummy and Pat.

2019: Mum text to say she was making an extra big lasagne for tea if we wanted swing by on the way home. We didn’t finish until 8pm so this was great. Ate lasagne and watched the tasks and bakes on The Great British Bake Off whilst catching up with cat cuddles. Caught the news and horrified to hear that 39 bodies have been found in the back of a lorry in England. The driver, who is only a couple of years older than me, has been arrested on suspicion of murder. Kinda puts life into perspective.

#swimming #parents #kids #GBBO #cooking #food #cats #news

July 17th – No Room at the Inn and no Chance to Swim

1999: Mum packed the swimming bag this morning and when she came down she found me painting my toe nails (and toes) with her nail varnish. I thought it looked nice, very colourful, but mum didn’t think it suited for some reason. We headed for the pool – only to find it closed until next week. I took it well though and we went to visit Aunty Eesa instead. I played in the garden for a while with the girls and then we went home. I’ve got a bad throat and am feeling a bit poorly so mummy gave me some Calpol and I lay on the settee watching Pat. I didn’t sleep and spent the rest of the day whining – that’s mums professional diagnosis anyway. My point of view is that Dandell and Dessica came round and I didn’t want them to play with my toys. We went to the park, but things didn’t really improve there either as they kept playing on the equipment which all belongs to me, why doesn’t everyone else realise this? I fell asleep on the settee at 5.30 – much to mine and mum’s relief.

2019: So 21/2 weeks until my Snowdon run and mum discovers that the inn she’d booked through Air B&B can not accommodate us. Fortunately she booked another one at Bala. She was very pleased with herself, until I pointed out she’d booked for 1 adult and 5 children (and theres only 5 adults going!) Oh well. I’m sure she’ll sort it!

#Bala #Wales #Snowdon #toddlers #childhood #adulthood #swimming #mums #parents #swimming

April 17th – Water and Fire

1999: Saturday – up at 7, but mum wasn’t having any of it and refused to get up until 8. We did a bit of hoovering and cleaning – well mum did – I watched T.V. Mum knew my eagerness to do housework would wear off eventually but she wasn’t actually expecting it to happen until my teenage years. We went swimming at Maldon and I made mum laugh in the car – I kept on tutting and saying ‘on mate’. I don’t know what was so funny, I don’t laugh when she shouts ‘oh come on mate, get a move on’ and other choice things. We had a good swim; with slightly less air than usual in my arm bands and I kicked and moved! We went to Donals and then to see Aunty Eesa and the girls and Dandel and I had a right giggle playing. Mum says she is so proud of me because I have done all this without a nappy (I won’t tell her about the big wee in the swimming pool).

2019: So its a shame about Notre Dame catching light on Monday (and hats off to the amazing firefighters who put out the blaze) but am astounded by the money raised. As the Archbishop of Bantebury says: Imagine if Grenfell had some really important stained glass windows and examples of gothic architecture, instead of just human beings . Contentious I know, but I couldn’t agree more. Kinda puts things into perspective

#swimming #driving #lazydays #saturdays #NotreDame #facebook #fundraising #Archbishopof Banterbury #Grenfell #macdonalds #swimming #toddlers #adults #pottytraining #firebrigade

March 6th – Modelling with Blond Highlights

1999: – Mum it’s Saturday – a busy day none the less! We went to Chelmsford to get my 3rd ‘watch me grow’ photo taken,. Mum put my leather waistcoat on for this occasion and I proudly told everyone I was ‘mart’. I pulled my usual stern face during the sitting with the odd smile here and there. I actually thought it far more fun to very slowly dribble out the corner of my mouth, putting more force on it just as the man took the photo! Mum didn’t seem too impressed though. We walked through the high street to the swimming pool only to find it does not open until midday. Doesn’t anybody realise today is Saturday? People want to swim. We walked back to the car and on the way mum bought me a packet of milk buttons to munch on in the buggy and we popped into Zanzibar to buy some tapers and incense sticks. We then made a quick exit when mum noticed a lady walking around with a chocolate button wrapper stuck to her trousers! We eventually left town and got stuck at the traffic lights. Hold up mum, the lights are green, the right hand lanes moving but we’re at a standstill in the left. Mum. MUM. Those cars are parked! How embarrassing. Everyone behind was very patient. Well she has died her hair blonde……….

2019: My mums blonde moments are endless. There really wasn’t any hope for me. Having said that I’m definitely the more sensible one and actually have some common sense. But then again mum did remember to leave me a list of jobs to do today! Shopping and cooking were the highlights.

#blond #hair #ditzy #growing up #photography

January 14th – Table Manners

1999: I had a very restless night and apparently so did mum – now that’s what I call a coincidence. I slept in every angle possible on both beds (we swapped 4 times apparently) and at 6.30 started muttering about Pat again. Of course most of this is mummy’s version of events as I was mostly asleep throughout and I really think she’s taking this Pat thing a bit too far now. Mum made me cry at breakfast this morning. I was quite happily sitting in my high chair, flapping a whole rasher of bacon from my mouth, when Mummy told me to take it out. Well I didn’t see what was wrong with this so I carried on doing it and do you know what she did? She broke my bacon! After breakfast we went for a swim for a whole hour – Mummy eventually bribed me out of the pool with Pat (I thought you didn’t like him, this is so confusing).

Tonight I did my usual in the dining room making everyone on my table wear their napkins in their collar, just like me and then I gradually pull mine out so that they’re all sat there looking very funny and I’m the grown up one with mine abandoned! After dinner we went to the cabaret room for our usual dance. All week I have wanted to stand on the stage and sing into the microphone to the music, and tonight mummy let me do it. It was great fun and everyone was looking at me. The trouble started when a man then came on and started playing the organ and singing, and I wanted to go on the stage “again”. Mummy said I couldn’t as I’d already played and it was now the man’s turn and suggested we danced instead. As we danced on the floor I realized that everyone was paying attention to the man on the organ and not me and I wanted to join in with him, so I smacked mummy in the face and next thing I knew I was being marched off to bed. Well no one’s going to see me there are they you stupid woman!!

2019: No dancing or playing today just lots of hard work in stuffy lofts. Still like my tunes though and sing along in my van loud and clear. Tried to stay awake to welcome Mum and Mark home but was soundo in my bed by the time they got back

January 12th – Antibiotics, Food and Gut Bacteria

1999: We arrived for breakfast to discover the high chair ready and waiting. I ate bacon, a sausage (which looked remarkably like poo, I picked it up and said so very, very loudly, at which point Mummy crawled under the table, I don’t know why, she can be so embarrassing at times) and a slice of toast and marmalade. Trudged around in the freezing cold sleet for 30 minutes to find a GP surgery as I keep falling over and am now back on antibiotics for ear infection. We went swimming and I did really well holding mummy’s hand up and down the swan slide and so eventually she let me have a go on my own. I fell backwards; mummy caught my leg just in time. She had a banged leg and I have a banged back. In the dining room tonight I wanted the “ man” (waiter) to pour my juice into my cup. He obliged saying “hold it tight” as I held on to my cup. All was going well until half way through when I dropped the whole lot over my trousers. We had to go back to the room to change and I had hysterics thinking I was going to bed, but we went out again – dancing. I have won the hearts of all, nearly everyone here knows my name and I had several dances with several ladies tonight. I wave to them all when I leave one room and say hello when I go in to another.

2019: Well after a hectic week Zof took me out to dinner last night at Bella – our first date restaurant – love Italian and my table manners have improved, although I remain fairly clumsy so drink spillages are not that uncommon. I don’t swim much now but did train as a life guard when I was 17 and spent a year at Camber Sands and a year at Scratby lifeguarding until going on to other things. One of those things being club host and entertainer – still love to dance and be the centre of attention some nights, although other days and nights will see me hiding away from the world with anxiety and depression and I struggle to even place an order at MacDonalds. Things are much better since I met Zof though and we are now thinking of getting our own place. Crohns not great at the moment but I continue of the immune’s and mum is certain a lot of this is due to all the antibiotics I had as a child knocking out my healthy gut bacteria so keeps trying to feed me them too (lucky she’s away at the moment!)