May 25th – If I Close My Eyes ………

1999:   I don’t think mum really wanted to get up but I was so full of beans she didn’t really have much choice. Spent the day at Edons and was very tired again.  Played in the garden and had pot noodle for tea.  Well, I had half and the birds had the rest.  Was so tired that I didn’t want a bath and went to bed at 5.45 and was caught sneaking out and playing with my toys at 8.00 when Nanny and Pa arrived – so I got up!  Aunty Karen came round to pick mummy up and we all waved them goodbye.  I was wide awake again so Pa and I played hide and seek, but I cheated; looking though my fingers when he went to hide.  When it was my turn to hide I went off with my hands still over my eyes.  Did I do something wrong?  I always seem to make others laugh even when I’m not trying!

2019:  I sometimes wish I could cover my eyes now and pretend Crohns hadn’t found me, but it has and, in a way  I’m glad it has helped shape who I am today. Two years can seem like a lifetime, just wondering when the next flare up will be. Comparing the pictures above – 2 years ago on the left I was hitting the gym every day, single with only myself to focus on, living at mums at not very motivated, but as ou can see not at all healthy. On the right, I’m now in a loving relationship, living in our own place, not going to the gym but eating well and currently have a strong mindset to kick the inflammation that has returned post surgery.  Colonoscopy next week and reviewing treatment plan.

#crohns #mentalhealth #hideandseek #childhood #adulthood #toddlers #mums #parents #grandparents #training #goodfood #girlfriend #homeofourown

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Ditzydotcom

I may do stupid things and make light of them but deep down there’s a reason and I love exploration, even if I cannot fully understand the outcome!

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